Should we fight to be loved?

Fighting to be loved is a trap. It’s not loving others....it’s using others to love us. If I fight for you to love me, then I won’t tell you when you’re selfish or try to stop you from being selfish, because that may hurt my chances of being loved by you. If I love you I will tell you...as kindly as possible.... when you may need to change, even if it means you may not love me. Loving to be loved is called enabling or co-dependency. Loving to be loved is not love. It’s selfishness. The answer is first understanding we don’t have to fight to be loved because we are loved. Salvation and the love of Jesus is the free gift of God lest no man boast. In other words, we don’t have to fight for it. All we have to do is accept it. When we realize we are loved despite being unloveable, then we find ourselves wanting to love the unlovable. When we love the unloveable, we will find ourselves loved not only by Jesus but by others. Loving is not enabling. Love speaks the truth for others sake. "This is how God showed His love among us: He sent His one and only Son into the world that we might live through Him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and His love is made complete in us." 1 John 4:9-12